Thoughts about Kinder and Hailey is 11 Months!

Dear Hannah, 

I don't know what is going on, but I am so sad to see you start school once again. This past week you started 2 days of gymnastics class and I really miss hanging out with you. Is it because I'm less sleep deprived and more patient? Has turning 4 flipped a switch that made you just so pleasant to be around? Has not having to fight for attention made you just a nicer person in general? I don't know. 

 You really are a caring, thoughtful and helpful kid and because we now spend most of the day Nathan-free, this part of you really shines through.

 We've had lots of quality time together while Hailey sleeps. You love to play with your little Cinderella figures and tea set. You are also OK with just putzing around, playing with random things while I get things done around the house. I could be vacuuming, cooking, or cleaning and you are always within sight, just playing.

 Nathan,
Tonight I got a chance to meet your teacher at Back to School night. I was very impressed with your teacher and I pretty much think that she is the perfect teacher for you! Even though I was a teacher myself, I've always been intrigued by how younger elementary teachers differentiate when there is such a wide range of abilities when they start school. Tonight, Ms. Reid did a great job explaining the method to her madness.

After listening to her presentation, I am now super excited about Kindergarten for you. I think this year will be a year full of growth both emotionally, socially, and academically.

Here are the points that I was impressed with:

• Every day, you guys will have circle time. She utilizes "restorative justice" to help share feelings, resolve conflicts, celebrate accomplishments, and encourage each other. 
• Math is not a series of worksheets or flash cards. What I love about it is that her process of teaching math is more focused on metacognition, getting you guys to think about your thinking. I know that this will lead to a deeper level of understanding of concepts, which in the end will help with higher level thinking. It really is a student-led process and so developmentally appropriate for Kinder. 
• Reading will also be differentiated and kids will be assigned word lists based on their ability. 
• You guys have 45 minutes of recess each day divided into 2 sessions! 

Well, that's all I have to say for now. Kinder. Exciting times! 

Hailey, 

You are now moving with purpose and gumption. You now know cause and effect. You know the purpose of things and you are trying to talk and say phrases like "nai nai" which means milk. Which also kind of sounds like "no no." 

 You absolutely love peas. You will eat your weight in peas if I let you.

 You are also getting pretty good at feeding yourself. You are now at a point where sometimes you won't let us even hold the pouch for you--you have to do it yourself.

 You love taking things out of buckets and then putting them back inside. I don't remember this being a huge stage in Nathan or Hannah's baby days, because I remember reading it as a milestone in baby books and thinking to myself, "They don't do that..."

 You also now understand the purpose of markers. You especially like red and pink, which can easily be mistaken as blood...which caught me a few times already.

 If given a spoon and a baby is close by, you will feed the baby.

 But when you try feeding yourself (or if Mommy doesn't seal your pouch properly), you tend to make a mess, a big, hose-you-off with a garden hose kind of mess.

 You are also now pulling and starting to cruise when you can. It seems like you just want to climb up these days. If there's nothing around to pull up on, you will crawl to me and pull up on me. It's like you have an itch to climb and you just can't get enough of it.

 Today, you were fascinated with putting a block into a chute and watch it come flying out. And then you did it again, and again.

It's been so fun playing with you and hearing you giggle. You will give a good belly giggle when you see things fall down. I don't know why it is so hilarious, but you just get a kick out of it.

I generally have to wake you up at around 7:30. You go down for your first nap around 10:15, sleep for an hour and 45 minutes. Then around 2:30 you go down for another nap. This usually lasts for only 30 - 45 minutes. At around 8, you go to bed and you wake up at around 11:30 and 5:30 for a feed. You are sleeping about 13.5 hours a day, which is a good amount for you.

Things are finally settling down at the Havlir household for now. Except for the 3 birthday parties coming up this weekend. Yikes! On the plus side, birthday parties usually mean fun!

Until next week,
Love,
Mommy

First Day, Birthday, and Waves

Dear Nathan, 

Well, it finally happened: your first day of Kindergarten. So I'm kind of looking back at my last post, thinking to myself, well, that was a bit dramatic! On Monday, we all woke up, ate breakfast, and at 7:25, we crossed the street to take you to school. Your actual teacher was still on Vacation, so you actually had a sub for the first 2 days of school. So, when we dropped you off, you found your seat and started to write your name on the worksheet. I gave you a hug and a kiss, Hannah ran over and gave you a kiss, and we walked away. Very low key, and that was it. I didn't even cry. 

Pick up was another story. So far, kindergarten pick-up has been quite stressful for me. First of all, Hailey has been needing to go down for a nap right before the pick up time, 3:00. So that first day, Hailey was over tired, the sun was hot (they made us wait outside until 3:20 before we could pick up the kids) and then after I found you we couldn't leave because I couldn't find your teacher to sign you out. Well, I find out the next day that only 1 teacher signs all of the walkers out. We didn't get home until 3:40. Luckily Hannah left most of her drama at home that day. (The next day she announces that she had to go potty after we arrived at school and we were waiting outside) 

So of course I ask you about your first day and instead of being very excited, you were not as enthusiastic. The first thing you told me was that a kid spit in your face. Apparently he had been claiming that girls are stupid. You told him that girls are not stupid and that's when he spit in your face, which then caused you to cry. 

At pick up today, as soon as I walked into the gym, I found you sitting and sobbing. I thought that maybe someone stepped on your fingers, but between sobs I could only get out the words, "and then she moved." On our way out the teacher who is the official checker outer told me that she had to separate you and your friend because you guys were rough housing. I think you started to cry because you felt like you were in trouble, and that you felt like you were separated unjustly because she didn't even give you a warning. 

So it begins. 

I'm glad I've been listening to lots of mom podcasts recently, because I feel like I am now better equipped with how to handle situations such as these. I wish I could keep you in our bubble forever, but it's these little lessons like how to interact with other people and how to submit to authority that are so important. 

Things you like about kindergarten: 1. Lunch time, 2. meeting new friends, 3. a different schedule each day. 

Things you don't like about kindergarten: 1. Writing practice (you had to write 7 uppercase AND 7 lower case "A" today!) 2. You can't talk as much as you want to. 3. You don't get to play with toys. 

Overall, you told me that you still enjoy Kindergarten more than pre-school, so I'm sure I'm just hearing the bad stuff and not as much of the good stuff. 

So a few of the moms of preschoolers from church got together to make shirts for you guys. We took a picture at church this past Sunday. 

You are fearless in the water. You now can dive, jump and do flips in the water. 

Dear Hannah, 

On Sunday, you turned 4! You are now taller than Nathan was at 4. You are an assertive girl who knows what you want.  You can act as prim and proper as a princess, but then you can also sword fight with the boys. To me, you are my little Wonder Woman. For your birthday, you invited 3 of your closest friends over and the 4 of you celebrated your 4th birthday over a princess tea party. Crafts, food, stories, 

 and alphabet bingo! All of your favorite things.

 I've noticed that you can be a bit bossy and assertive. Today I sat down with you and we had a little talk about it. After some thinking, I am pretty sure this bossiness comes from me barking orders at you all the time. A part of you really needs to feel in control. So one thing that we are trying is that when anyone in the family is acting demanding or grumpy, we hold up a peace sign to remind them to speak in a nicer way. So far, it's been effective. We'll see how it holds up with time.

On Sunday, we had a movie night at church. It was a big finale to a sermon series on "The greatest" and the night was circus themed. I helped out with face paining while you big kids ran around with Daddy doing all the things.

 With Nathan gone this week, Hannah, we have been spending lots of time doing things together. While Nathan just wants to stay home all the time, you love being out and don't mind going to Home Improvement stores, Costco, or the grocery store.

 And when we at the last of the pineapple pastries that Ama brought from Taiwan, you had this idea of making some ourselves. So, we watched a few youtube videos and we made a batch of pineapple pastries today.

They turned out pretty good. What I found amazing was that while we were baking, you were able to pretty much explain the whole process and we would often correct me or ask me if I remembered to add a certain ingredient.

 You are also getting more comfortable in the water. You love to swim to me from the edge of the pool. You could do that for hours.

 Dear Hailey,
You have been a champ at sleeping lately. While you averaged just under 13 hours of sleep a day, for the past week, you are getting close to 13.5 hours of sleep. You are following a schedule and you continue to take longer than 60 minute naps. I actually have to wake you up just so you would have enough time to take another nap, which would carry you to bed time.

You must have been going through a leap, because now you can wave "hi" and "bye," express and repeat, "more" which actually comes out as "ma" and you have figured out to go from laying flat on your tummy to sitting up. This weekend Daddy will be lowering your crib.

 When we go to the pool, I can tell that you really enjoy being in the water. You just start shrieking and flapping your arms as soon as I put you in the floaty.

Every time I will have you practice swimming under water for a few seconds. You are getting pretty good at turning to your back, but I guess I never wait long enough for your head to pop above the surface, and I usually grab you as you are turning over on your back.

 This is probably your current favorite toy. You love making music or playing with things that make noise. You will do a little dance when you hear music come on. It's pretty adorable the way you bob up and down, sometimes you wave your arms a little, and that smile that stretches across your face...adorable.

 I feel like this year has been a very transformative year for me. I've really been thinking about who I am as a person, as a mom, and as a daughter of God. I may write a post about it later, but in short, I feel like I have become more confident and I've come to terms with my shortcomings and flaws. In turn I can see how it's affected how I mother the three of you.

Ok, it's getting late. I need to go to sleep. Until next week,
Love,
Mommy

Week 46 and the Last Few Days before Kinder

Dear Kids,
This week has been very task focused. We've been to the car shop, school supply shopping, and grocery shopping. After a few weeks I have finally figured out how to peacefully shop with all three of you. It's been a good mental exercise for me to delicately balance Hailey's nap needs with all the places we need to go.

1. Assign tasks. We were stuck at Walmart for about an hour while our car was getting fixed at the shop next door. We had a short list and when you guys were getting "bored" we stopped by the toy aisles and spent some time there. And then I let you guys ring up our purchase. Luckily the store was empty, so there wasn't anyone behind us waiting to use the self check out counters.

2. Distract with food. We arrived at the shop about 30 minutes before the car was ready. Luckily they have a Kurig machine that makes hot chocolate. It took about that long for you two to cool your hot chocolate and finish them. Hailey took a much needed short nap while we waited.

Hailey, you have become more independent. Being able to feed yourself from the pouch has been a life-changer. You still prefer the pouch to finger foods so I will usually offer you a selection of finger foods and when you start to treat them as projectiles, I'll whip out the pouch and I can eat in peace for a few minutes.

One evening before your bath, you grabbed Nathan's toothbrush and started to brush your teeth. You are really starting to understand how the world around you works. You have pretty much mastered light switches, buttons, and banging things.

Hannah, I don't know if it's me getting more sleep these days or you just becoming more mature, but you have really been a joy to be around. I've been really trying to be gentler and more empathetic towards you. I'm finding that you are like when I was a child; always coming up with interesting ideas for solving problems. Like in the picture below, you decided to take advantage of the torrential rains to clean the screens on the patio.

Sometimes you two drive each other (and myself) nuts. But when I can tell that tension is starting to build up between you, I will separate you and then sometimes it slowly transforms into you two vs. me as you guys try to sneak and play with each other.

I've been trying to work on getting Hailey into a good sleep rhythm, so I will usually ask you two to do something quietly while I go through the bedtime routine with her. (Hailey is so sensitive to your voices!) Sometimes you two have dance parties in our bedroom, other times you two are coloring, and then recently, I see moments when Nathan, you are reading to Hannah. My heart just melts. 

But some days you two end up wrestling each other and chasing each other around the house. Overall, I'm thankful that you two play pretty well together.

While temperatures have slowly creeped back into the triple digits again, we took advantage of the "cold front" that brought the rains and spent some time outside. Hailey you are getting braver with crawling around and you absolutely love swinging on the swings while sitting on my lap. You have no fear and love it when I go high. You shriek excitedly and flap your fists.

Love this picture because all three of you are in it. 

We've started to strap you down to the high chair because you will do things like this. It's pretty amazing how you have not fallen yet [knock on wood] but I think you have pretty good balance.

Here, you are straddling the armrest, and while you are doing so, you are even able to reach back to pick up a bite of grilled cheese sandwich!

This summer I've been really consciously trying to limit screen time for you guys and myself. One day this week, we made space paintings. I worked one step ahead of you two, demonstrating the process and you two just followed along on your own paper. I've been trying to experience life with you, instead of just watching you from the sidelines. Besides sitting down and doing things with you, this also means reading a book at your pace, stopping to look at the pictures, wonder, and ask questions. I used to get so annoyed when you guys would stop and interrupt the story with questions, but I've been trying to stop and be more in the moment with you guys. It's really made my experience as a stay at home mom more meaningful. Instead of just watching you guys, I'm really getting to connect and get to know you two a little bit better. 

I think these turned out pretty good, don't you? They also look even cooler when hung on the window. The light shines through the planets (and spaceship) beautifully. This project was cool in that it sparked a lot of conversation about space. Hannah, you proclaimed that space is your favorite because it is black and your current favorite color is black.

So Nathan, today we went to meet the teacher night at your school. You didn't get to meet your teacher because she is out of town until mid-week next week, but at least you got to check out your classroom and meet a couple of new classmates.

I didn't think this was going to be such a big deal, you going into Kindergarten, but after talking with many people over the past few weeks, every parent remembers that day when their child goes to Kindergarten...even if it happened over 50 years ago! I don't remember too much about my first day of Kinder, so I'm thinking it's more of a milestone for us parents than it is for you kids. 5 more days until your official first day, so I may make a special post about all the feelings that will come with that.

You are a sweet kid, super smart, and outgoing. What I am worried about the most is how you will handle situations where you are being treated unfairly (for example when a kid doesn't take turns). Right now, you tend to act out angrily if I don't intervene so perhaps you will learn in Kindergarten how to let little things not bother you too much.

I'm starting to think that you are like me, an INFJ personality. I used to think you were very extroverted, but lately, you have shared that you prefer to play in small groups and if there are too many kids, things just get too crazy. You are definitely not shy, but I'm starting to understand for myself how introversion does not necessarily mean shy. Today we watched a few old home videos and it's been so interesting to see how you have matured, but still have the little mannerisms that you exhibited since toddlerhood.

Well, that's it for now. We have a super exciting weekend coming up. Hannah turns 4!!! We are trying out an "party is your age" philosophy (for now) and so Hannah, you have picked 3 friends and the 4 of you will enjoy an afternoon of princess tea party.

Nathan, we've started to talk about your birthday since it is also coming up and you only want to invite one friend over. (see what I mean about the introverted tendencies?) That's totally ok with me!

Well, I'm going to try to take as many pictures these next few days and update everyone again next week!

Love,
Mommy

Grandparents, Children's Museum, New Tooth, and More

 Dear Kiddos,
After Auntie Momo left last week, we had a few days to ourselves before we had more visitors. But before grandma and grandpa came to visit, we finally got our "mudroom" furniture installed. Since our "dining room" is barely big enough to fit a small ikea round table, we decided to transform the space into a mudroom/homework/craft center. When the carpenter arrived, you guys were so excited to help and were so disappointed when I told you that you two needed to stay away. Luckily, the carpenter, Chris Duncanson, was totally cool with letting you guys watch him pretty much the whole time he was here. He explained to you guys his tools and what he was doing so patiently. Apparently that was how he got into carpentry. When he was a kid, he watched people remodel his house, helped a bit when he was older and decided to go into the trade.

 Saturday morning, Daddy took the big kids to home depot for their kid's workshop. You guys built easy bookends and then when you got home, grandma and grandpa arrived. We took it easy and just stayed home that day.

Big News: Hailey slept through the night! Hailey slept from 8:00 all the way until 6:00! So far it has only happened once, but I'll take it!

On Sunday while I was at roller derby practice, you guys went to church. We all met up at Rudy's for lunch. While I was scooping out creamed corn for the big kids, Hailey got a hold of the pickle pile and snuck a pickle. Hailey, you seem to like the flavor of the pickle...

 Afterwards you all went to Bob Bullock Museum and then Hailey and I went home for naps. Daddy didn't take any pictures of that adventure, but I heard that you guys watched a pretty cool 4D video.

On Monday we went to the McKenna Museum in New Braunfels. Nathan, you were complaining about how it wasn't going to be any fun, but after we arrived, you ran around like a kid in a candy shop.

 Hailey, you worked on your climbing and crawling skills. The last time we were here, Hannah was only 3 months old. (And yes, I meant Hannah).

photo credit: D. Collins

 Most of our Summer Fun School friends also met up with us at the museum. You guys played for a little while, but then broke off and did you own thing.

photo credit: D. Collins

 Hannah's favorite spot was probably the pretend grocery store. Hailey enjoyed riding around in the grocery cart.

 There was also a art area with a station where you could paint your own face!

 You both wanted to paint my face... I settled for arm tattoos.

 I had drawn a sheep on myself, and for fun, Nathan added a large body of water under my sheep...hey!

 Hannah, you drew spiders and lady bugs, because who doesn't love some creepy crawlies on your arm?

 When we got back home that afternoon, we thawed out our last pack of 3 year old cherries from Door County and made a cherry pie. It was quite delicious.

 While the pie was baking, Hannah, you and I had a mommy and daughter date at the pool. I feel like I need to have these occasionally with you because you are so independent, I  easily overlook you and tend to spend more time with Hailey, or play board games (which you are not a fan of right now) with Nathan.

 Yesterday afternoon grandma and grandpa left. In the morning, you guys got to spend some time together at the park while I took Hailey to get my oil changed and car inspection completed. I was so excited about not having to take all three of you to the mechanic, but the window tint on the car (from when we first bought it 4 years ago) did not pass the inspection, so I'll have to take you three back to the mechanic soon. Not looking forward to that!

On our afternoon walk yesterday, I noticed these black berries scattered on the ground. I first thought that they were muscat grapes, but upon closer inspection, I realized that they were Texas persimmons. I picked one off the tree and tried it. It tasted so sweet! So after dinner, we went back out to forage for some more of the juicy, sweet fruit. There's just something so satisfying about foraging.

 In the end, we probably picked about 2 dozen little persimmons, but it was a fun experience.

Today we had a Kindergarten playdate at Baldwin. You guys even got a chance to see what it is like to eat lunch in a school cafeteria! Nathan, you did a great job of looking around to see if anyone around us had peanut butter.

Hailey and Hannah came along as well. Hailey just spent the time looking around and Hannah reminded me of myself as a kid, wanting mom to come with me in a new social situation. Nathan ran around, but I was surprised that you didn't really interact with other kids. You did walk up to a group of kids and immediately asked if anyone was allergic to peanut butter. 

Hailey, you have been sleeping longer stretches at night, which I think also comes with new abilities. You are really getting to be more coordinated with your fingers and you also seem to understand cause and effect. 

 You got a new teeth in this past week, (3rd (upper right) incisors) and this time it has not bothered you as much as the first 4 teeth did. You have been chewing on your fingers, drooling a lot, and when you get slightly fussy, I give you a toy to chew on and you seem to feel better.

A cool trick that you can do is turn off the lights. We have to watch you because this morning, you somehow wriggled your way out of the high chair straps, stood up, and turned off the kitchen lights. And then later that morning, you turned the switch on a surge protector off. We have to watch you, you sneaky baby! 

I can't believe that there is only 1.5 weeks of summer left! Once school starts things will be a bit less crazy at home, but will be slightly more busy in general. So, I think we will make the most of what we have!
Until next week,
Love,
Mommy