Third Time's a Charm

Dear Kids,

I'm not going to lie, but I question my ability to parent 3 children on a daily basis. Somedays I just don't have the patience, time, or energy to do it how I would like to. On those days, the not so nice side of mommy comes out. When I just had Nathan, I read all the books, scoured all the internet forums on all the topics and I looking back to those days, I still made so many mistakes. With Hannah, I made a bit less, but with Hailey, I feel like I now have a chance to redeem myself and finally meet my standards of what it takes to be a good parent. 

Mind the fact that those standards have dropped quite a bit, so that may be a contributing factor. 

For example, I am not above encouraging my children to flash others while getting their picture taken.

 Hats inside the house are ok, especially when you are playing video games.

Licking your oatmeal bowl clean is also completely acceptable. That's one less step I have to take before it goes in the dishwasher.

I've also become more relaxed when it comes to food. Nathan didn't have his first lollipop until he was 3. Hailey had her first one just the other day because she did a great job waiting while Nathan was visiting with the doctor (more on that at the end). 

Cole slaw is an acceptable form of vegetables. (Hailey, you love coleslaw. One day we went through the drive through and I ordered a small coleslaw for you. You quickly screamed, "No, big one!"

We have picnics on the porch and I let you have chips. Nathan probably didn't get chips for lunch until he was 4 or 5! 

Letting you paint yourself or other things buys me some time in the morning to get stuff done. The sacrifice is small because washable paint is so easy to clean up. We have paint marks everywhere, but one day when ya'll move out of the house, I'll just powerwash everything real good and the paint will come right off...hopefully. 

 I used to spent time looking on Pinterest for cool crafts for you all to make. Now I just hand you the recycle bin and say, "Make something cool" and you all are ecstatic.

At 2.5 years old, Hailey, you want to try rollerskating...yeah, that lasted for a few seconds before you I made you quit because my back was getting sore from holding you up. The old me would've had to deal with a temper tantrum. 

 The new me comes up with a cool hack and temper tantrum averted!

I don't think I've ever voted in a primary election after having kids. Well, this time, we just did it and Hailey was the star of the show. You charmed every one of the senior volunteers at the voting poll. 

I used to give you all ownership of your toys and would let you guys decide what toys to donate/get rid of. I quickly learned that everything is "super special" to you so I came up with a different game plan, just get rid of stuff that's not put away. Well, that turned out crazy and too many emotions were involved. This time around, I just did it myself...when you all were at school. I got rid of 2 large trash bags worth of stuff and you all didn't even notice that stuff was missing.

 It may not sound like it, but I really am enjoying motherhood at this point. I'm loving this toddler stage more so than with the previous 2. Perhaps I was either pregnant or caring for a newborn when the first 2 were at this stage, but I love observing Hailey just explore, learn and wonder what we are going to do next. It's super fun and I love hanging out with you.

This past weekend we attended a neighbor's birthday party. They had a face painter and Hailey, you were determined to get a cat painted on your face. And you did a great job sitting still for the painter.

 Hannah, you got a unicorn, which is different from the usual rainbow butterfly that you request.

 And all three of you also got balloons which you all like to pretend sword fight with. It's been really neat to see how you older kids try to include Hailey in on your pretend play. Hannah is a bit more intentional about including Hailey so it's cool to see how Hailey looks up to Hannah. With that being said, when we are in the car and I have music playing, Hailey does not let Hannah sing. Nathan is allowed to sing, but Hannah is not...which I think is so hilarious  interesting.

Ama is in town for a couple of weeks. With the coronavirus stuff going around, we are going to stay put during spring break and maybe even brave a birthday party or two.

We went to the wildflower center this past weekend and took some pictures. These are a few of my favorites.

In 2 days, Nathan, you will be getellting surgery to take out your adenoids and tonsils. It all started with a dental check up, which lead to a referral to an orthodontist, which led to a referral to an ENT, which led to us scheduling your surgery right before spring break so you have the break to heal up. Apparently your adenoids are taking up too much space and you are not breathing well at night. I'm hoping this will help you sleep better and maybe help with your sometimes volatile temper tantrums.

Well, that's about it. I'm sure I'll do a post about it afterwards, along with our spring break adventures.
Until next time,
Love,
Mommy

Getting in a Good Rhythm

Dear Kids, 

This week's post will be a short one as I feel like life is just steady right now. We've gotten in a good rhythm and things are just...good. 

Seems like Valentines Day was just a week ago, but it's been 10 days. You both had the day off from school so while in the morning I had a meeting to attend, we got to make some chocolate covered strawberries in the afternoon. I remember back to when Nathan made strawberries the first time at the age of 2.5. You were the same age as Hailey!  

Fast forward 5 years, you two have it down! I didn't even know what to do with myself. 

Nathan, you did most of the dipping and Hannah, you decorated each one with an assortment of sprinkles.

Meanwhile, I searched the pantry to find other things we could coat in chocolate....potato chips!

With you guys this year it was like Valentine's week. I kept on getting suprised with random presents, cards, and I even got a dollar from Hannah.

Hailey, you are mostly potty trained. You know how to use the potty if I put you on it, but you are still working on being able to tell us when you need to go before the pee pee comes out. However, when you do, it's just a little and you are able to control your bladder until we reach a potty.

I have to watch you like a hawk. If I even attempt to multi-task, this is what I come back to.

I think you are starting to understand that you get 2 squares to wipe if you want to wipe yourself. You can definitely count to 2, sometimes you just forget and keep going!

One day Hannah and I had a mini date at the asian market. We got bubble tea to celebrate and we just had to take a picture to remember the moment. When you get individual attention, you are actually such a cool kid!

We also had parent teach conferences last week and Hannah, you walked around the room to show us all the things that you do in a day. Now Hailey knows what I mean when I respond to her daily morning quesion of, "Where's Hannah?" with "School."

Last week was also belt testing. Your whole class worked very hard and everyone was able to be promoted to the next belt.

As recommended by our dentist, we went in to see an orthodontist, who recommended that Nathan go see an ENT to see if there are any structural problems that conflict with breathing. You ended up having a cold on the day of the appointment, so we have to reschedule for another day when you are not. 

Hannah's second tooth is lose and is also about to come out anyday now. 

Hailey's vocabulary is starting to expand and you are now speaking more English than Mandarin. I think you understand both, but prefer to speak English. There are a few phrases where you will still use mandarin, but it's getting smaller. 

Well, that's about it for now. 

Until next time,

Love,

Mommy 

Making Deeper Connections

My Dear Honey Buns, 

With each passing day, it gets more interesting to watch how the three of you interact with each other. Hailey, now that you are older, and saying more 3 word phrases like, "Can't reach it," "Nathan, Stop it!" or "I like it." the older kids now kind of know what to do with you. They still need to work on talking to you when you do something annoying (as opposed to just pushing you away, or frantically calling for my help). 

 Nathan and Hannah, Hailey really does look up to you two and while sometimes your temper tantrums scare her, she watches your every move and misses you both when you are at school.

Hailey, now that we've cracked the puzzle of your lactose intolerance, you seem to be exploding in your language development and you generally are just happier and more care free. Living in a state of chronic tummy pain has got to be tough. You can now focus on other things like being helpful with sock matching,

Dinner prep

You love peeling the strings off of snow peas. 

 Dressing yourself

You were very proud about putting on these socks all by yourself. 

Texas "Ice" skating

You love the "ice skating" station at gymnastics.

 Illustrating your own books,

We created a book about a chicken family one day. You were telling me to draw all sorts of things, so I decided to make a book out of it. I drew and you helped color. 

 Dancing,

This was at Nathan and Hannah's school dance. You would just raise your hands and jump up and down with the music. I've never heard you giggle so much, and you were simply loving all of it. Livin' la vida loca! 

 Eating oatmeal once again,

You've always loved oatmeal, but I stopped making it when we figured out you couldn't do dairy and didn't like the soy milk version of oatmeal. You now request it every morning! You love it with milk, sugar and eggs, no fancy stuff like blueberries (I learned the hard way). 

 And just being goofy. You love pretending and imitating what we do regularly and it's so endearing to see how you nurture your stuffed animals (except for when you throw them across the room during a tantrum) I'm hoping that your nurturing nature is a reflection of how I am with you. You would think that after 3 kids to practice on, I'd finally get it right!

 Hannah, you are back to loving martial arts. Below, you are working on your blocks.

  Everyone earned power stripes this week so next week, you all will be going through belt testing for the next orange striped belt. Exciting!

Hannah earning power stripe. 

 Last weekend, you had a special father-daughter dance with Daddy at church. Many of your friends were there with their daddys and at some point, I receive a text message with you and your friends dancing up on stage with feathered boas and tiaras to boot. We took a picture before the date...

 and then both Nathan and Hailey complained about wanting to be in the picture (well, Nathan was attempting to drop a photo bomb) and Hailey was just running around screaming, "Cheese!" So we let you two get in on the picture.

Last week I got to volunteer at Chinese school and when I shadowed you around, I realized just how little chinese you can speak. At home, you can understand most of what I say, but when it comes to speaking, you can't seem to recall the vocabulary needed. I'm going to try to make more of an effort to helping you be able to speak more. 

We've been working on phonics both in chinese and english. We are on chapter 72 out of 100 in the learn how to read book and we are about 70% finished with re-learning the chinese phoenetic alphabet. This past Sunday, you all skipped Chinese school and I just did the lessons with ya'll at home. This helped me realize that I can be doing more to help you both learn Chinese. 

A few weeks ago, you both went to a friend's nerf party. As the only girl at the birthday party, I was very proud of you as you ran around with the boys in the arena. You even requested your next birthday party to be there.

I've noticed that you've started to be more socially aware of what others are doing and you tend to not want to be the only person doing it. Like me, you want to fit in and and not stick out. I get it, but I'm going to continue to encourage you to speak up and stand your ground for what you think is right. You've got fiest in you and I'm not gonna squash it. 

Nathan, 

I've really enjoyed our time in Math Pentathlon together. Even though I'm coaching a group of 16 kids, I still feel like it's our thing and you being the oldest, don't get that too often. I asked you if you wanted to still participate next year and you said, "Are you kidding? I love math and I love board games, of course I want to be in it!" 

You also love martial arts. You are very enthusiastic, often wanting to show off what you know, the moves that you have, and usually responding with the loudest voice in the class. I can see that you want to do your best. I actually took this picture below because you had offered to take both yours and Hannah's backpack, along with the math pentathlon box because you wanted to work on your muscles. Apparently Hannah wants to get stronger too because by the time we reached the house, both of you were fighting over who gets to hold everything, and meanwhile a dog walker walks by wondering why I'm making you guys carry all the things...

 The school dance was a blast for everyone. Once again, you both gravitated towards the stage...

 Your room is basically a lego mine field. Legos are literally everywhere. I'm surprised you have not hurt yourself by stepping on one in the middle of the night. You still enjoy playing legos, but recently, you've been playing with the duplo set and you even taught me that the duplos are compatible with the regular legos! Mind blown!

 I had to snap this picture because I found it so sweet that you were petting Teddy and that he trusted you enough to actually fall asleep. I think back to your toddler days when Teddy had a fear of your toddler fingers and would run away when you got remotely close.

 I also look forward to our evening game time. I'm at roller derby practice 2 nights out of the week, but it's fun to be able to play games and see your critical thinking skills improve over time.

 I saw this come through the take-home folder and I just love everything about it. You love math and science (as a science teacher, this makes me soooooo proud). I also think it's endearing that you know you get frustrated easily, and you want to stop. And I love your people figures with their elongated necks and chubby fingers!

 And this sweaty final picture from the nerf party shows your intensity in life. You go big or you go home. That is your motto and I love it!

It's been about 7.5 years since I've become a mom and for the first time in a long time, I am finally feeling more of myself again. For so long, I've been so focused on survival and making sure that I was making attempts to check things off of the checklist, that I forgot how to be fun and funny. I think I created some undue stress on you kids and now that I've changed (maybe it's the sleep?) I can feel more connected to you all and I feel like you all are more at ease with me. I hope this continues and is the "me" that you will remember me by. 

Love, 

Mommy